A Birthday Escape: So This is 25

Gracias for all of the Birthday wishes! Below you will find some random ramblings of a recently aged 25 year old:

Well, today is the day. I was officially born a quarter of a century ago. It’s so funny when people ask me how it feels to be 25. It literally feels just like any other day, except more people are talking to me today and I’m making more exceptions for eating poorly. Haha. Plus, I have been 25 for less than 24 hours so… yeah.

I just spent my birthday playing Dance Dance Revolution at Dave & Buster’s while wearing an OG Power Rangers cutoff graphic tee. But I also have a career, bills to pay, and a husband. So I guess this is adulting at its finest. 25. Ahh, what a time. To be alive. 

My husband got me a bike for my birthday (probably because I’ve been begging all year and I was going to buy it for myself eventually). I rode it, and I definitely felt old. Well, just really out of shape actually. My legs were burning after a solid two full revolutions of the pedals. I don’t remember riding a bike being this strenuous. But then again, I didn’t have to carry so much body weight back in the day. 

 I’m lying in the bath right now. The water is a purpley tint from the bath bomb I threw in. Shoutout to Lush! Sponsor me?! Please. But really though shoutout to my friends for hooking a chica up with these gifts doe! And just shoutout to forcing me to participate in actual human interaction and relationships. Otherwise, I would be a hermit. Still a semi-hermit. But das okay. 

I’ve grown so much. Gotten rid of so many people/places/things that had a negative impact on me. Wow. Look at that 24 year old woman. She went through it. She grew through it. Dang, she’s badass! 25 looks good on her. Happiness looks good on her. There are still some chains to break but good gracious she’s looking mighty free in this new light! She’s loving it. I’m loving her. Beautiful growth. A struggle turning into a victory. This is 25. I made it!

What’s next?!

 

Escape Singledom: Wife Life – Month 1

Well, you guessed it. We have been married for a whole month now. We’re making strides here people. Making strides. Just kidding. It actually still doesn’t feel real. And at the tiny random moments that it feels real, it feels like it was five minutes ago that we did the whole wedding shabang.

Anyway, can I even comment on marriage after a month of being married? Haha. I’m still feeling out the whole marriage gig, so let me just share some things that I have noticed since becoming a married woman:

My name has changed!

That exclamation point was not one typed with enthusiasm as much as sarcasm. I have been called “Mrs. John Lewis” about 328745345 times. And my little feminist heart cringes… every… single… time. I might have, slightly, agreed to the last name change and although we both have the same initials, I could have sworn my name was still Jessica. But other people beg to differ. Sometimes it’s funny to me and other times I get annoyed. But hey, tis the wife life I guess.

Guys try to hit on me and I can finally take it one step further than, “I have a boyfriend”.

So many times have the words “I have a boyfriend” come out of my mouth. And so many times have I heard: “you can’t have friends though?”, “he’s not here now”, etc. But it’s just something about saying “I’m married” that really can repel most guys. Guy at the gas station just hit me with the “excuse me, are you a married woman?” I said yes and he threw his hands up and slowly backed away. I like that.

I am expected to be a master chef.

And my husband isn’t even the one worried about me cooking. At the wedding I had other women ask me or talk to me about cooking. I get it. That might have been a thing for you when you were growing up and/or got married, but dang. The first words out of your mouth after Jay and I get married are “can you cook” instead of “congratulations”? I wasn’t feeling it. And I’m sure none of them asked my husband if he can cook… *rolls eyes* But don’t fret fellow women, my husband ain’t missing no meals, whether they be cooked by me or by Dylan at the Bojangles around the corner from our house.

Children need to happen, and STAT!

“So when are you having kids?” “How many kids do you want?” “Do you want boys or girls?” “You should name your kid *insert name*” People are probably just excited about the idea of children now that I’ve taken the next step and gotten married. However, I’m not pressed. Whatever happens, happens. And no, I probably won’t be naming my child after your favorite celebrity nor your great grandpa.


Okay. Okay. Sarcasm aside, the first month has gone well. Nothing has really changed, other than the little butterflies I get when I refer to Jay as “My Husband”. We still do everything we did before we got married. Well… except that one thing that married people do that we weren’t doing… But enough about fist bumping our wedding rings together like we are part of Captain Planet’s team. I can’t wait to see what Month Two brings, especially the HONEYMOON! And I pray that I stay this excited throughout the rest of the months that we are going to spend together.

Escape Singledom: 7 Reasons To Go To Marriage Counseling Before You Get Married

I’m not going to lie, I did not want to go to Marriage Counseling at first. I don’t like to talk about myself and I don’t like people knowing my life. But I realized that this wasn’t about outside people knowing my life, it was about my future husband knowing my life, my baggage, my thoughts, my experiences, my preferences… and even I managed to learn a couple of things about myself throughout this process.

I know how great of an experience (no matter how uncomfortable) that Marriage Counseling was to Jay and I, so I want to give you 7 Reasons To Go To Marriage Counseling Before You Get Married:

  1. You discuss issues in a safe environment that you would have otherwise let simmer until an instance created a fire.
  2. You talk about topics that you might not have even thought that you should.
  3. You learn information about your partner that might not have come up in regular conversation.
  4. You are able to go into your marriage without bringing along any regrets or old issues that haven’t been dealt with.
  5.  You receive advice and counsel that helps you learn how to live in a way that aligns with God’s word/plan.
  6. You learn new things about yourself that might not have been discovered without these conversations.
  7. You learn to communicate better with your partner and with God.


Are you married or getting married? Have you been to Marriage Counseling? Share your stories below.

Be sure to check out my last Escape Singledom post on The Proposal!

Escape Singledom: The Proposal, as told by the Proposee

It all started on a Sunday…


We have company. Jay’s uncle came to provide some of his handiwork. Jay’s brother and his brother’s girlfriend are at the house, too.

Jay tells me that we are helping his grandparents out because they are hosting a party. It seems legit, so I didn’t think anything of it. So everyone is getting ready for the party. My nails look like crap, so I decide to paint them… thank the Lord… those pictures would’ve been a tragedy. I get all dolled up in my heels and my little faux fur vest. Everyone is ready to go except Jay. So I am annoyed… especially when his brother, uncle, and brother’s girlfriend decide that they are going to just drive separate. Jessica don’t like to waste that gas, honey. I was annoyed with Jay and he was probably annoyed that I was annoyed because of what he had planned to do that night.

We finally get in the car and it’s a given that we are going to be late. I am sooooo annoyed. How are we supposed to help host a party when everyone is already there way before we even arrive? Then we pull up to his grandparents house because they “forgot” something. I am so over it. Late as ever, we get to the clubhouse and somehow magically get a spot right at the door, suspicious. We start walking towards the door and Jay is acting all weird wanting to hold my hand and stuff, also suspiciousWe don’t usually hold hands too often. I’m annoyed so I probably smacked his hand away. We go inside and then we are walking towards the door to the actual room and I’m thinking it doesn’t look like there are too many people here because I didn’t see anyone, even more suspicious.

I go in the door first and the lighting is dim and I see people crowded in one corner with their phones recording. I immediately think oh crap, we ruined someone’s surprise and start to push Jay back out the door. But he’s pushing me back in the door. So I’m like what the heck and then I realize… oh… this is for me. And he does his lil speech telling me how awesome I am and gets down on his knee and asks me to marry him. I feel like I said yes or at least nodded my head but only God can verify at this point. He put that rang on my fangah and bam, WE’RE ENGAGED!


He did so well on the ring too people. I didn’t pick it out or anything. I just told him what I liked:

  • cushion cut
  • circular shape
  • twisty design band

20/10 he hit the nail on the head. I love it! ❤ Thanks boo. Only 71 days to go. 😉

1012572_10205638329463181_8617873665432025875_n



Check out the first post in this series here. You won’t regret it. 

Escape Singledom: Couples 123 Tag

Hola! So I am on a 4 month countdown until my wedding day and I want to start a new series for wedding related posts. It is going to be called: Escape Singledom.

In my first post of this series I wanted to do a fun tag. I found the Couples 123 tag.

There are 10 questions.

Each question is asked and each person comes up with an answer.

Couple counts to 3 and reveals his/her answer at the same time.



Pre-Tag Thoughts:

I think that none of his answers will match mine and I may get slightly annoyed. There will probably be a lot of “really” and “are you serious” being said with some shaking of my head. We shall see what happens, lol.

Here are our results:

  1. If your fiance could be married to a movie star who would it be?

    • Him: Paul Wall, from Fast and Furious. Lort. 
    • Me: Ryan Reynolds. Since I don’t want to be Paul Walker’s widower. But if he was alive… LISTEN!
  2. If your fiance could be a celebrity who would it be?

    • Him: Beyoncé. Fair answer. 
    • Me: No one. Not really into being a celebrity.
  3. You’ve gone to 711 to get milk and decide to buy your fiance a treat, what did you buy?

    • Him: Ice cream, duh. I do love icecream. 
    • Me: Slushy! Or Candy…
  4. What percentage of house work would your fiance say that she does?

    • Him: 30. So generoussss. 
    • Me: 20…
  5. If your fiance could choose one thing for you to get rid of, what would it be?

    • Him: Junk Food Snacks. I do try to get him to eat better. 
    • Me: Those dang fish tanks!
  6. What is your fiance’s most repeated sentence or phrase?

    • Him: You slow. Touché. 
    • Me: I’m hungry.
  7. What is your fiance’s most used [pet name for you]?

    • Him: Toots. Also correct. 
    • Me: Tooty.
  8. What is your fiance’s ultimate favorite movie?

    • Him: Star Wars, may the force be with you. I can see why he chose this. 
    • Me: Don’t have one.
  9. A meteor just hit, you’ve saved everything important, what would your fiance go back to get?

    • Him: Ice Cream. Really?
    • Me: Everything else. I am a hoarder and am emotionally tied to a lot of things. 
  10. The saying opposites attract is true because my fiance and I are opposite at _______?

    • Him: The Definition of Cleaning. He tidies up, done often. I deep clean, done not as often. 
    • Me: Almost everything that deals with preference.

Post-Tag Thoughts:

It was much more entertaining than I thought it would be. And other than having to explain the rules fifty times, I wasn’t very annoyed at all. So I think this tag was a win and we both definitely got our giggles in for the day. 



Do you know of some more relationship tags or challenges that might be fun for my fiancé and I to do? Do you have any wedding-related post topics that you would like me to discuss? Let me know in the comments!

Escape to 2017: 2016 through the Rear View

If you haven’t visited the Home page or read the About page, the title of this post may come off differently than I expected. So be sure to check that out as a reference.

I think that going into a new year is always a good excuse for self reflection… that is, if you needed an excuse. I am all about self-reflection. And the way that my mind is set up, I reflect… a lot. Blessing and a curse.

Reflecting on how far I have come creates a sort of gratitude in me. Reflecting on the bad times breaks the chains of the negative and actively changes my attitude about my life. However, once the chains are broken it is important to leave that negativity in the past. Learn from it and let it go. On the other hand, occasionally looking back on the good is definitely acceptable, in my opinion. There just comes that line where you are simply reminiscing on good times or you are actually living in the past. That’s where it gets tricky.

With 2016 at an end and quickly entering into the new year, I wanted to share my highlight reel of 2016. I just want you to know that sharing the highlight reel of my year does not mean that it was a perfect year. It just means that I would rather see the high points when I choose to glance into my rear view and part of escaping the lower valleys of my past is dealing with them and leaving them right where they are.

  • I got ENGAGED!
    • I get to marry an awesome man.
  • I was able to TRAVEL!
    • I went on a Euro Trip with my best friend (her first international trip). We went to Rome, London, and Paris. Look forward to some posts about this trip soon!
    • My fiancé and I visited some awesome friends in Puerto Rico. We had a blast!
    • My fiancé and I finally visited the Biltmore Estate in Asheville, NC. I def want to go back for Christmastime at least once.
    • My fiance’s family and I went to Orlando! I love the theme parks there because they have rides that I will actually get on.
    • I went on a birthday trip to Wrightsville Beach with my boo, best friend, and her boo.
  • I earned a PROMOTION!
    • “I’m the captain now.”
    • Well, I earned two to be exact, but who is counting… *toot toot*
  • My NEPHEW was born!
    • His name is Carter. He was experiencing some health issues but his tests are looking pretty normal these days. 🙂
  • My GODSON was born!
    • My first official experience witnessing the miracle that is birth. His name is Carson. Yes sometimes my brain wants to spit out the name Carter.. but don’t worry, I have not mixed up the names outside of my mind.
  • I said YES TO THE DRESS!
    • Okay, so the price tag kinda puts a damper on things but it was the second cheapest I found and the dress itself is very beautiful. And I don’t look too bad in it, lol. 😉
  • I spent New Year’s Eve with my boo at CHURCH!
    • I have honestly never spent New Year’s Eve at church. I have heard of other people doing it, but I was either partying in college or watching the ball drop with my family and sipping on that sparkling grape juice. I can truly say that I enjoyed spending the night at Church. Having the rest of my family there and sipping some sparkling grape juice wouldn’t have been bad either. And it’s not like you can’t dress up and be cute at church, too. 😉

Well, I tried to condense this list as well as I could party people. Although, there are many more highlights where that came from.


What are some of your 2016 highlights? Share them in the comments below. I would love to know!

A Christmas Escape: Twas the Night Before Christmas

Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house.. every creature was stirring but none were a mouse. Eight little rascals and three in their teens, all running a muck with big smiles that gleamed. 

The grown ups were no different, with laughter filling the air. Although, you wouldn’t get the joke… you just had to be there. 

The smell of barbecue and hush puppies filled the room. And the the cards were crafted, because Christmas was coming soon. There was music and dancing, and some screaming happened too… Followed by a stern talking to, and a few boo hoos. 

There were board games to play and pictures to color. We unwrapped gifts with oven mits, and almost got beaten by our mother. 

We handed out gifts while gathered around the tree. Everyone began to rip them open once I counted to three. They opened Darth Vader sneakers and Monster High dolls. The kids were excited and jumping off walls. We opened gifts of clothes and blankets with pictures. I hope that my sisters like their lotion and slippers. 

It was chaotic and annoying, but also so fun. I wouldn’t trade this tradition, not for anyone. 
Merry Christmas Everyone!